Single moms! Fill the daddy gap.

I have been asked a few times if I wish I had a daddy in my life. If I feel like I missed out on something growing up with a single mother. When I respond, I can feel or see that my response is unexpected because my answer is NO. To some, this is either a lie or I am in denial.
May be life would have been 'better', may be I would have grown up into a different woman, may be my opportunities would have been different, may be my mother would not have to work as hard as she does, who knows. But I never at any one moment sit and build castles in the air picturing what it would be like to have 'dad' in my vocabulary (It's not a word I am very familiar with) or to come back home to a big daddy hug. I have seen people with awesome fathers and instead of the wishful thinking, my only thought is-good for them. Could it be that I just can't miss something I don't know?

This was an indicator to me that single mothers can actually fully fill that daddy void and they don't even know it. Since no woman (but a few) makes it their life goal to be a single mom, there is no black and white formula as to how the daddy gap can be filled. The love that naturally flows from that maternal cup and the realization that your child has only you does the job.

At ours, we did not have so much. My mother was always picking ideas here and there on how to make ends meet. We now joke about the hard times we had. I ask her how she did it. She also has no idea when she looks back. She was a little tough and rules were to be followed (even if I was a crazy one) because she knew she had to handle this in any way she possibly could. There was a joy that always surrounded our single-parent-home. We played and enjoyed things like any other children. And we turned out fine.




Many single mothers on forums all over the internet curse absent fathers, forcefully try to drag unwilling fathers into their children's lives. They feel it's better to have that 'father' in whatever form he comes, that is, abusive, irresponsible, unsupportive, than to have their child 'fatherless'. I understand it, now that I am a mother, seeing what joy my husband gives my son. Stop whining, get up and dance to the music. He is absent for a reason.
Focusing so much on the absence of the father, you miss out on filling the gap he left. And, the negativity rubs off on the little ones. Single mothers should instead make time for their children a midst all the hustle and bustle, be involved in their lives, bond with them. They have just you to do it anyway. Good father figures like uncles can also be a great influence on your child, try and give them that male someone they can look up to. Choose wisely!

Time to look on the bright side ladies. Children brought up by single mothers have responsibility to themselves and a self drive to do things like no other. They are strong and thrive so well through difficulties. They know mummy is working hard to make ends meet and she is doing it on her own so they have to make it worth while. They usually feel the need to give back to their mothers who have single-handedly been there to support their financial, emotional, and any other needs. This is such a motivation for them to be the best they can be. We all know not all present fathers are good daddies. So who knows, his being away could have been good riddance to bad rubbish after all. A one parent happy home is better than a two parent one that is always in conflict. Children derive a lot of positive and negative vibes from the environment they grow up in. Don't be so hard on yourself. It's not easy to put a positive spin on your situation when you are making so many sacrifices to deliver the best parenting you can but there are bonuses to enjoy from single parenthood. Use the chance to form an even closer relationship with your children.


There's no denying that there is the dark side. The psychological effects so-called studies have found. The strain on you to deliver the best for your child with no extra help can easily divert your energy away from your children hence forgetting to provide the necessary attention. Builds up a lot of stress too.
It's in your hands to try and drive these as far away from your home as possible. Create a loving home, build their esteem so that they don't feel like other children have something more special than them. Be a good example, your children are looking up to you and only you. Don't go around bashing men, telling your children how terrible all of them are, including their father. You must be honest about the reasons their father is not in their lives but highlight that there are many wonderful daddies out there. This is especially if you have daughters, you don't want them having 'daddy issues' in their future relationships. If you choose to date again or remarry, choose men that are going to be a good father figure to your children, not just one that satisfies your needs.
Don't be so afraid to mess up. Even children with fathers in their lives go astray. Just be the best mother you can be.


Ask me what I would do if I had a chance to turn back time and have a father in my life? I'd leave things just the way they are. I'd only sneak in a father-daughter dance on my wedding day, haha. It has always made me teary with its beauty.
I may be not have everything I want or hoped for but I am grateful with how my life played out with a single mom. She may not have done everything right (no parent does) but she did and is still doing an incredible job that I can never be able to repay her for no matter how much I tried. I developed a sense of maturity way above my age and it prepared me for the real world way faster than many people I know from two-parent homes.
The ideal home with both parents is great and everyone should give it their best shot but if it doesn't happen, embrace the uniqueness of single parenting.

Thank you mummy for the painful sacrifices you continue to make for us and for perfectly filling the father gap like there was no gap at all.
Cheers to all the strong women who are not playing victim but standing up and dealing with it.


LT

Who is in your circle of friends?

'Keep your circle small' they say. This has been a tough one for me from way back as a child. My mother says I brought home a new friend everyday all through primary school. Something to do with my personality maybe. I have made attempts to tighten my circle of friends but end up sneaking in one more, then another and another. From kindergarten all through high school, my report card read things like: Linda is a good at making friends, Linda should reduce her number of friends for more concentration, Linda is a good student but always in the company of so many friends.

It was all so cute back then when friendship was all about exchanging dolls, watching movies together and giggling about the hot boys in class. Now as an adult where you can't seem to fully trust or rely on anyone, a few people like my family constantly warn me about having so many 'friends'. My husband calls them people I know, not friends. He has a point. They have warned me of back stabbers, users, frenemies over and over again. On several occasions, I have tried to screw up that 'circle of friends' a little tighter. I now know better how to stay away from certain categories of people.

For someone who let's in so many people you would be surprised to find that I have trust issues and may actually be more careful about the people I surround myself with than people with a tight, shielded, hard-to-break-into circle.


Here's how I see it. Different people bring something different to your relationship.

I have friends I have known from way back in high school or as kids and we clicked so much then. With life throwing us all over the place, we find that we may not have that 'click' anymore but hold each other so dear at heart. These people know the raw you before the world changed you into whatever else you have become.

There are people I have had great friendships with for a while but somehow with life's experiences, we have outgrown each other and can no longer hold conversations at the same wavelength. Nothing happened, they love you, you love them, but that's all there seems to it. They still hold a special place somewhere in your heart but their time in your life ended.

There are people you are comfortable sharing particular conversations with. People who understand you in a unique way. Could be because they have been there or are going through the same thing.  I mean they 'get you' when it comes to certain things. For instance, I have friends I think are really amazing but who would be bored to death with a conversation about the little circles my son draws on my feet every morning when he jumps into my bed while others will go ahead and tell me about the sweet songs their kids sing that don't even make sense and we will giggle about these silly stories for hours.

There are people you are sure to have a fantastic time with at the bar or in the club but that's all you call each other for and that's alright. So expect a text most probably on a Friday or Saturday night when it's time to 'turn-up' like it's called these days and be sure it's going to be a fun-filled evening. Usually no talk of future plans and ambitions are welcome unless it involves a shot of tequila. Everyone needs that friend with whom they can let their hair down, do embarrassing things with and laugh about it the next day. Life's too short to be so serious. Right?

Some people are simply nice to be around or talk to, they have a positive vibe that naturally surrounds them and are a breath of fresh air. You feel good just sitting on the same table with them. You surely want that kind of person in your circle even if that's all there is to them, don't you?

Then there are the new friends that are like long lost siblings. They just seem to have come into your life at the perfect time like a missing piece of the puzzle. Yes, brand new friends can be awesome too.

See why it gets difficult to narrow my circle of friends?

What is more important is knowing where you stand with the people in your life. Over time, you can tell the friend who can't keep a secret, the one you can't trust with finances, the habitual liar who just can help it, the one who is your friend only because it's convenient for them (it just might be convenient for you too, win-win), the one who is most likely to stand by you when shit hits the fan and the one most likely to take off, the one with inappropriate social etiquette just in case you plan on carrying them along for a work cocktail.

Now I know you're wondering "why would someone like that be your friend in the first place?". Because we are all imperfect somewhere but that doesn't necessarily make us bad people.
Simply learn to associate with people accordingly. We all have weaknesses but everyone brings something different to the table at some point and we impact each others lives in unique ways. That's why it has always been hard for me to have a single best friend. It's too much a task to put on one person.

Now I'm not saying every Tom, Dick and Harry should be invited to your party of friends. Be selective on who you give a front seat. There people that are toxic, negative, users that you just can't work around, keep those at a distance. People who have screwed you over again and again and again. Say "enough" and shut that door. People who are simply not transparent enough and your gut simply says NO. Yes, listen to your gut, it can feel negative from miles away we just don't pay attention to it.
Keep closer that friend who will leave whatever they are doing to come and help you get out of a crisis. You know the kind who will borrow money to help you clear a debt. The one who will defend you when everyone else is throwing stones at you.

Friendships should be two-way and a beautiful thing. If a friendship is weighing you down more than it's bringing you up, you most probably should not be in it.

LT

Fall in love with YOU

Everyone secretly pictures what it would be like if some things about them were different. A smaller nose, a flatter tummy, a rounder butt. Back in high school, I thought I was too skinny. I wanted to have curves so bad. Now that the curves fully blossomed, I want that skinny body back. Society is continuously putting pressure on us to think, behave and look a certain way in order to be good enough to fit in. Yet, what blows A away may turn off B. You can't please everyone and there's always a new 'cool' coming up everyday. It's a never ending story that can only have a happy ever after if we could just love ourselves with what we have. As cliche as that sounds.

Right now if you asked me if I could change something about myself, I have a few things in mind. I recently asked my mother the same question to which she responded, "nothing". She told me she is well aware of her imperfections and maybe a few changes would be great but she's so confident with who she is, she barely gives the flaws any thought, she forgets they exist. We all need that kind of mindset.
I think it's normal to want to improve things about yourself. Not just physically but mentally, emotionally even spiritually. It should not be a bad thing, there is always room for improvement. It's only a problem when the need to 'be better' makes you lose your self worth and pulls down your esteem. When you are occupied with the feeling of not being 'good enough' that it affects your well being.

A day doesn't go by without stumbling on a quote or update somewhere on social media about loving yourself. It's all become so much talk but no action. Most of us say these things without actually meaning or believing any of  it. We go on about how important it is to love ourselves because it makes us feel good for those few minutes of writing or reading it.
Don't you want to have that 'feel good' feeling every morning when you wake up? I know it's all easier said than done but very possible if you get out and do something about it.

I have been working on loving myself more and still a work in progress. It's an awesome journey I thought I'd share what I have learnt along the way. It's not something that happens overnight but like a child learning to walk, you start with baby steps, stagger here and there, until you can walk firmly.

Self love is not thinking you are better than others. It doesn't mean throwing it in peoples' faces that your esteem is high up there. It's very easy to drift from self love to narcissism.
Self love is self acceptance, knowing you are good enough with all your imperfections and don't need anyone's validation or anything on the outside to make you feel that way, it's from within. A lot about how people feel about you roots from how you feel about yourself.

So......

I have learnt that loving myself starts from treating and caring for myself really well. Look good to feel good, I always say. I will wear a fancy dress and my most attractive lipstick for no reason. Reminds me I am all that and more on those days when I feel 10 years older.

I constantly point out awesome things about me. Say, my long legs and outgoing personality, haha. A midst all the imperfections, there are wonderful things about everybody. Take a moment and highlight yours. You will be surprised how many wonderful things you overlooked all this time while you paid attention to the 'defects'.

I resist comparing myself to others. It's only human that you wish you had things someone else already has. I would love to have Lupita's success, my neighbor's house, my sister's killer body but guess what, they wish they had someone else's something too or even something I already have. We would most probably want some more if we got what we think would make us feel better right now. It's a viscous circle. Believe me, comparison it's a trap, every one is suffering with something even if it doesn't show. Love what YOU have been blessed with. 

I surround myself with love and positivity. People and situations that make you feel less of yourself are not good for you. Cut them off. These put pressure on you to be all kinds of things that you lose sight of who you really are or can be. That's why it is important for parents to tell their children right from childhood how special they are, it raises them to love who they are. It could be a friend, a family member, a partner, a job that only highlights your negatives. Drop it now!

I am learning to be kind to myself. We often say horrible things to ourselves. 'You can never make it.' 'Those goals are too high for you.' 'No one can love you.' 'You're so ugly'. Things you would not even say to someone you did not like so much. Teach yourself to be confident and self empowered. I look in the mirror often and tell my reflection she's so sexy and charming then walk away feeling like a million bucks. You slowly start to believe and live by the things you say to yourself, don't be so harsh. 

I do things to nurture myself. Things that pamper me and make me feel good. Dancing, eating out in my favorite places, chatting with friends and family, sharing a good laugh, shopping, listening to music, a nice long warm bath, anything that lifts me up. Many times people get lost in doing things for people they forget to ever do anything for themselves. Often, it's a search for approval and acceptance. You have to be happy first to genuinely make other people happy. When you can't do something, speak up and say so. When you won't tolerate something, go a head and let it be known.

I have made self improvement my very good friend. I know I said we should love ourselves with all our shortcomings. But, where you can do something about it, do it. I am trying to eat healthier, work out more, interact better with people. You too can put in a little effort to get you to a place that will make it easier to love yourself. The feeling of lack somewhere may never go away but can be diminished.

When you learn to love yourself, you realize that you won't let anyone treat you any less. You walk, talk and relate with more confidence. You go out and do things that you thought you could never do. The outside world has less effect on how you move forward with your life. Nobody will have the power to determine how fulfilled you feel. Your happiness will be in your hands.

Remember, self love is a process especially if you're coming from a really low point so give it time. Start by self appreciation.

Happy self loving.

LT

Why I married a white guy

He is wealthy. He is a better lover. He cooks. He helps around the house. He helps with the baby. Bla Bla Bla. Those are some of the responses people would like to hear when they gather the guts to ask, 'How come you married a white guy?' along with other questions like, 'Did you always know you would marry a white man?' 'Is he different from black guys?' You know, like he breathes a different type of air or dropped from somewhere in the clouds. While some or all of those qualities might be true, they have nothing to do with his skin color but the person he is.

I'd like to point out that this post is personalized from my research, daily life and interactions with other people. I respect that many might have a different point of view. Having said that, I do know that I am also speaking for very many out there. Now let's carry on :-)

''I am a black woman married to a white man. I tried the Black man, all were thugs, even the educated ones. Could not marry that. Tried a white guy almost by accident, it just happened. Though we later broke up as friends, I was hooked. Dated exclusively to white guys after that. When I married it was a dream come true. Our life is great and our kids (3) are great also. My girlfriends are all trying to meet white guys also....no more black criminal thugs who think it alright to cheat, lie, steal etc. Yes I understand there are exceptions, and I apologize to them, but not enough exceptions to be worth the chance. And I plan to encourage our daughter to also marry a white guy. They are the BEST. To my black sisters out there, get out there and find a white guy. You won't regret it.''

This is something I read somewhere on the internet and it made me sad. I have always thought it's a silly thing to attribute all good qualities to one group of people while attributing all bad ones to another. One of the reasons I don't go by stereotypes so much. People are just people for the most part. There are good and bad men in every continent. Then of course some tendencies are more common among certain groups than others and I acknowledge that. But I have a problem with people putting down one race because they prefer another. We all have preferences, doesn't make them the best choices or others any less good. I also have a problem with the common assumption that black women married to white men can't possibly be there because they found a nice, loving, husband in a white man. She must have been on a look out for the white knight. A relationship based on skin color so to speak like the Mrs. I quoted up there clearly displays it.


When my husband and I met, we made no impression on each other at all (it did not matter he was white and I was black). After a few dates and getting to know each other more just as friends, we realized there were things we had in common and  many we liked about each other. PS; still not related to our races, just who we are as individuals. We saw each other as human beings first before we cared what our cultures and heritage contributed to who we are. Which they do. Depending on where you are raised, you learn to do certain things a certain way but you are still you despite this. Say, kind, sensitive, loving, impatient, aggressive, intolerant, you name it.

Five years and a handsome toddler later, our home is a very interracial one. We do 'white people stuff' as well as dance to African jams. We are teaching our son to embrace his African heritage while he celebrates being part Italian.

Our traditional marriage

So I did not marry a white man to escape the polygamous, unfaithful, unromantic African man. Neither did he marry an African girl because she is super submissive or easy to manipulate. No offence to those who married for those reasons, to each his own, as long as you are happy. If I had met a green, yellow, blue man with the same awesomeness my husband has, I would have married him.
Interracial marriages are not some sort of solution to God knows what, because guess what, there are white men that don't cook, don't clean, batter their wives, far from romantic and broke as a church mouse. Just like there are fantastic African brothers that have been raised to treat their partners like queens.
No one needs to explain their reasons for marrying who ever they chose to marry. This is not some sort of justification for marrying a white man.


Interracial marriages have ups and downs like all other marriages. Further more, we have to deal with the difference in culture and blending the two together which can be a challenge. Culture is a part of who we are. My husband and I are now used to not laughing at the same jokes sometimes. Or misunderstanding each other simply because what may be normal for me might be weird for him and vice versa. A midst all this, we find a balance.

I'd be a hypocrite if I denied that there are perks of being married to a white man that I am glad I get to enjoy. Some things about his culture that I am glad to be apart of. Things from my culture that I am happy I got to avoid. I still wouldn't assure anyone that they are guaranteed a 'happy ever after' by just marrying a white man.

To my friends who tell me I'm lucky to be married to a white man, you're wrong. I'm lucky to be married to a good man. Period. So are my friends who are married to men of other races that are treating them right.
I have not done the statistics on which race has the best men and honestly I don't care. What is important is that you find love, respect, understanding, compatibility and all those other elements you look for in a partner. If a certain skin color is on your list, suit yourself :-)

And that is why I married this white man, we are imperfectly perfect for each other.

More posts on interracial love coming..........

LT

Let's talk undies

I have been a little quiet lately. Blame it on the summer. Travels and catching up with friends and family. It's sad to see that it's almost coming to an end but I shouldn't complain, it's been awesome and I love autumn.

Back to the blog, I return talking underwear. Panties, knickers, undies and whatever other name you have for them. I am probably not the best person to write about this because I'm not a panty lover, and I mean that literally.  Wearing them, shopping for them, not a fan of any of that. All women know how liberating a panty free day can be, don't you? Too bad we can't avoid them, or can we? Those parts need to breath every once in a while.

This post was inspired by a cousin I visited in London this summer. She joked about one of my most comfortable panties. And I was there thinking, 'there's no way i'm throwing out these, more-than-a-year-old  comfortable briefs. I don't care how much fun she makes of them'. I must admit, it did give me a wake up call that led to some serious cleaning up in that department when I got back home. And here I am few weeks later, sharing the little knowledge I have on the matter.
There is a lot to talk about underwear. The myths behind them, how to maintain and care for them, how and where to shop for them, which are more suitable for particular clothes and body types, the trends etc. I will focus more on trashing them on this particular post. Yes, saying enough is enough and into the bin.

We all have that one panty or two or three or more that we have had for a very very long time. If it could walk it would have escaped for dear life already and never look back. You have held onto it for whatever reason. It's comfortable, it was expensive, it reminds you of some special moments, it's not worn out yet (or so you think), you just love the way it curves your bottom. Usually these are just excuses not go out and buy new ones.

My mother taught us to always have clean, cute panties on just in case you got an accident and your skirt flipped or your clothes had to be taken off. So rule number 1. If someone else surprisingly seeing your underwear would be a big embarrassment to you, trash it. Some women will only have decent panties on when they expect a hook up. Others are caught off guard, ooops.

I think sometimes too much pressure is put on us ladies when it comes to underwear. He better have a clean, cute one too if I have to go all out. Interesting enough, many men may appear like they don't care for underwear but then again they do. Confusing, right? Ok, let me explain. If your panties have holes, discolored, stained, waist band losing elasticity and simply depending on God's mercy not to run down your knees, be sure they will be noticed and will say a lot about you. Unless of course you quickly take them off in perfect timing, who wants to go through that panic anyway? And how long are going to do it? On the other hand, nice underwear can easily go unnoticed except for men who are really into lingerie. He will compliment you on cute panties but look at them for just a split second. Others won't say anything at all but will silently appreciate it. So they do notice it after all. Whether it turns them on or not is a personal thing but an ugly worn out or stained panty is sure hard to forget.
Rule number 2. Spice up your panty drawer first for you before you do it for anybody else.


When it comes to underwear we all have different tastes preferences. Some are more comfortable with just a string running down their behinds on a daily while others like myself prefer hipsters, boy shorts and the so called granny or mothers union panties. Whatever floats your boat is fine as long as you spice it up every now and then. The trick is VARIETY.

Divide your panty drawer into parts.

• The dark colored, not so cute panties for that time of the month when Aunt Flo comes to visit. You don't want to ruin your white, lacy Victoria Secret panties that you'd rather save for more interesting days *wink*. 
• The nude panties for white or light clothes. My mother also taught me that my undies should never been seen in public.
• The seamless ones for those tight fitting clothes. Panty lines are not a good look girls.
• The 'sexy' ones. It could be lacy, stringy, teasy whatever brings the heat on. It could even be just interesting fabric and color.  Every girl should have those. No excuses. You have heard about the edible ones too, right?
• Thongs and g-strings minus being sexy are good for achieving an invisible look under clothes. Have a few for when you need them even if they are not your cup of tea.
• The all day comfort panties. These include the so called granny panties. These to me are must-haves for everyday life. They may not be the sexiest (even if they have made a sexy come back lately, check out the new designs) but with all the stress in the world today, you don't need to add an uncomfortable panty to it.  Keep them a little further in the drawer so that you're not tempted to wear them all the time. They don't have to be ugly, boy shorts and classic briefs for example can be cute.
• It helps to have some high waisted shaping panties for that hourglass look when you wear tight fitting, body hugging clothes like the body con dresses.

Now throw away all those panties that have clearly done their time. How do you know they are begging for relief from their duties?

• When the stains from last months period still look like it just happened. Gross!
• When the waist band has lost all elasticity. 
• When they have threads flying all over the place the moment you pull them out. 
• When they don't feel comfortable anymore but you keep saying to yourself 'one last time'. Continuous washing wears out fabric including that of panties making them loose and uncomfortable. 
• When the have holes, doesn't matter how tiny. They start to look like rags, throw them away.
• When they just don't fit right. Maybe they are not the right ones for your body shape. Maybe you have put on or lost weight. Doesn't matter if they are still new, get rid of them. 
• When you have had them since the first time he met you. You probably kept them because he said you looked hot that night. Chances are he will never forget them. 3 years down the line, trust me he is hoping he doesn't see them again. He won't tell you to change it up because he doesn't want to hurt your feelings so i'm telling you now.

I develop a really intimate relationship with my underwear that throwing them away hurts like a break up.
Most times I am just lazy to go out shopping. I keep moving it to the next day, then the next week till it doesn't happen at all.
If you're anything like me, just close your eyes every few months and trash all those panties asking for retirement. You will be left with no choice but to buy some new ones when the few you have left keep running out. Unless you choose to go commando :-)
It's nice to feel pretty underneath if even no one is going to see it. Take a quick look at your beautiful panties in the mirror before you put clothes over them, you'll understand what I mean. Good for your confidence too.

Now go clean up those drawers ladies and happy panty shopping. Here's an idea of what you are looking for.

LT

Is your SUMMER gear on?????

Summer is one of my best times of the year (before it gets unbearably hot). Everything is so exciting this time of the year. Longer days, louder music, less clothes and the warm weather of course.
All I think about is the beach, travel, accompanied with nicely chilled drinks under the sun :-)
June is here, weather already looks good in my neck of the woods, so how ready are you for the season?

Here are few things I pull out to get me geared up for these hot, sunny colorful days:

Shades. The direct sun is not very good for your eyes, so keep them protected at all times. There are many new trends of shades, find one that suits your facial structure. I prefer the bigger ones that fully cover the eye area for maximum protection.






Sunscreen. It's a common assumption that black skin doesn't get affected by sun rays hence no need for sunscreen protection. Wrong! The extra melanin sure gives people of African decent more protection from the sun so they burn less easily. But, there is still need to cover up that skin especially if you plan on staying out in the sun for long hours like bathing all day on the beach. La Roche-Posay sunscreen, spf of 20 works perfectly for me. You don't want to look years older from sun damage after the long summer you know :-)






Wide brim hat. I can't go through the season without this hat for sun protection. I don't mind the chic celebrity look that comes with it as a plus. My favorite are the ones woven out of straw as they go with anything and are pretty light.

Bathing suit. It's not yet summer time for me until that long chill at the beach, a nap right before and after a nice deep in the cool waters. And for that, cute swimwear is a must. I find that black makes me look slimmer but I love to go for color too. It's important that you feel good in your bathing suit. Find one that's perfect for your body type to boost your confidence. PS: Don't forget to clean shave or wax the hair along your bikini line and all those other hairy areas that are not usually on display in the cold season.

Shorts. Less clothes, less heat. I stock these up in different colors. If you're a bit shy about showing skin for whatever reason, or if you feel 'too old' for certain types of shorts, worry not. There are many kinds on the market say, with longer lengths or more 'decent' styles and fabric.

Sandals. Let those feet breath after the long wintry days. PS: Don't forget to get those nails done before you expose them for the whole world to see.

Skirts and dresses. Nothing is as freeing as these in the hot sweaty weather. You can feel the wind blow underneath these garments right to your skin. I collect them in all types, maxi, short, backless and I like to go floral and colorful too.

Playsuits. Same as shorts, skirts and dresses, these are perfect for the summer. You can have them both long and short. Very liberating.

Don't forget to drink lots of water, moisturize your skin daily and carry that lip balm with you wherever you go. Enjoy the holidays!

What are some of your must-haves for the summer?

LT

Holiday Inspiration: Thailand

There is so much to explore in Thailand, two weeks did not feel enough. Considering, I wanted to spend a good amount of time doing nothing but lying on the lovely beaches, taking a deep in the turquoise blue waters, sipping my cocktails and having as many of those cheap massages as possible while the sun blew away. 
I managed to enjoy a number of things though, and can say it has been one of my most memorable travels.
Thailand is located in Southeast Asia. The official language is Thai but many of the natives make an effort to speak English especially with tourists who are major contributors to the country's income.

Our first stop was Bangkok. We stayed at the Baiyoke Sky Hotel, found in one of the world's tallest buildings. The view, the view! You could see the whole city and beyond from up there.
This hotel also had the best and biggest breakfast buffet I have ever seen. A whole floor dedicated to cuisines from all over the world.

View from the Baiyoke Sky Hotel Restaurant 

After all that food, a good walk was must. So we hit the busy streets. The people were so polite and welcoming. The city is generally chaotic but interesting. 
The prices of things in this country will have your jaw dropping over and over again, that called for some intense shopping. And you can haggle over almost everything too :-)
Don't miss trying a ride in the three wheeled taxis popularly known as the 'tuk-tuk' while you get around.

The tuk-tuk taxi

We then took a tour of some of the beautiful, historic temples and palaces in the land. These landmarks have amazing architecture.

            

Wat Pho temple of the reclining buddha

                              

Golden Buddah at Wat Traimit

The floating market where goods, mostly fruits and vegetables are sold on boats was quite colorful and fascinating. They also cook some local delicacies on those boats that you can give a go.

After few days in Bangkok, we went over to Thailand's largest island, Phuket, located in the South. It has beautiful, long sandy beaches, some more active than others depending on your preference. 
Some of the activities to indulge in on the island are snorkeling, island hopping, diving, sailing, cave touring, elephant rides, not forgetting the bustling nightlife on the beaches.
The party central is Patong beach, full of bars, pubs, restaurants, and discos. There was never a dull moment. The atmosphere in this place made me understand why Thailand is a famous destination for bachelors too.

Canoe tour through the caves

Phi phi islands (location for the movie 'The Beach'), just 45 minutes away by speedboat were simply paradise. Planning a getaway? This could be the place for you.

Spending some time with the locals

Another 40 minutes away is the famous James Bond island (Khao Phing Kan) that featured in the James Bond movie, The Man with the Golden Gun. And yes, it's as lovely as it appeared in the movie.

The elephant rides were another pretty interesting activity. Trekking through the tropical forest, going up and down some hills on the back of an elephant was an amazing experience. I must admit it was a little terrifying being up there. I imagined what could happen if the elephant suddenly got mad in the middle of nowhere. But we were assured that our safety was guaranteed.

I love to try new foods when I travel. Thailand was no exception. Eating local is an experience in itself. 
Thai food is delicious so it was great tasting it right from the origin. Even if, there were a few things on the menu that I was a bit hesitant to try like the wood worm and bamboo worm insects.

 Popular snack in Thailand, fried insects

For 10 dollars or less, I could have a 90 minutes Thai massage. Awesome! :-)
You will find more than one massage parlor on every street. Watch out for the dingy ones,  it's better to have a good look around before you lay down.

Fantastic scenary

  Meals on the beachside

 A glimpse of the entertainment on Patong beach

All in all, Thailand should be on every traveler's must-go list. 
Keep in mind that there is always an inflated price on things for tourists, the trick is to negotiate.
The weather is typically tropical so you can visit all year through. The highest temperatures are around April while July to October is 'the rainy season'. 
I was there in August and it was perfect. Just few showers some days for a short while which was ok to cool down the air a bit. Otherwise, there was more than enough sun to go out and enjoy the beach. 


LT