Women who never want to have kids

Lately I have been stumbling on a lot of articles about women with no children getting sterilized. Some as young as 25 years. Most readers think it is a step too far for a woman who has never had kids to take. The fear being that she will regret it later (because at some point EVERY woman is expected to crave a child). But is it not possible for a woman to know for a fact that they never want to have children and those sentiments remain exactly the same later on in life? It doesn't mean they hate kids. Some could even make more awesome mothers than people who actually have kids. They just don't want to have any of their own.

For the longest time I, like many other people felt motherhood is a natural desire for every woman. A sort of calling, even if the maternal instinct is more alive in some than others. So when a woman says she NEVER wants to have kids, she's most likely to going be harshly judged by society. Like, what's her problem? What a self centered human being! She must be battling some psychological issues.

It was not after I became a mother that I started to understand why some women are more than glad to say NO to this job. Weird as that may sound. It still puzzles me just a little but that is probably because from the moment we are born, especially where I come from, girls are nurtured to become mothers, no questions asked.
Parenting is hard, exhausting, costly and tests you to your furthest limit. You come from being your best to your worst in a span of just minutes. No, seconds. They say it gets easier, no it doesn't. Every stage comes with a new challenge. And to think, with my kids both under three, I still have so much to deal with ahead of me. Not forgetting the toll it takes on your body physically. I see why someone out there would not want to sign up for that if it's really up to them.

When at some point in your life you give in to that maternal impulse and have a child, you have chosen to be a slave for the rest of your life.
Yes, a happy slave. Giving up things you care about like school, work. Being constantly nagged by little human beings. Spending your days covered in drool and baby milk. Fatigue becomes a part of you from waking up several times a night to running after the little ones. Sacrifices are continuously being made. Someone else's well being is more important than yours.
Remember that money you used to spend on travels? Well, now it's covering the piano lessons, the nanny and whatever else your child needs. Everything they do even much later on in life when the  diaper days are long gone affects you.  You still spend sleepless nights worrying about them. How they are performing at school, who their friends are, what they are eating, who they are talking to, who they are dating, what work they are doing. It never ends.
Oh and you get no compensation, no medal for the effort at the end of the day.

It may sound selfish for a woman to say out loud they don't want none of that. To feel that their freedom matters more than this life long commitment. And maybe it is. But that's allowed. Or at least should be. We have all been selfish at some point in our lives and looked out for ourselves and only ourselves. Having children you feel nothing for and will have no interest in raising just to impress people who won't help you bring them up sounds selfish to me. We know many women who have kids because they 'have to' not because they WANT TO. Women who don't have the tinniest pinch of the mother gene but still have children because they are expected to. I mean ''what will people think?''.
I'd rather the honest ones that are open about the fact that motherhood is not cut out for them and choose not to make an innocent child suffer the misery of being brought to this already difficult world unwanted.

These women choose their sanity over this motherhood bliss they only hear about.
You see, it's hard to explain to someone without children that at the end of the day it's all worth it (so cliché, I know). Which part? When they finally grow up and leave you to grow old alone while they start their own families? Haha. Some women might not think the joys of motherhood are all that anyway. They have never experienced it, they have no real idea how special its impact is, so I am slow to judge them for their stance on the idea.

The way I feel about my children, the meaning they bring to my life, the warmth they shower my heart with even when my spirits are low, the look they give me, the hugs, the smiles, the tears are all irreplaceable. A sensation so strong, I wish it on anyone who is in touch with their feelings.
The sense of contentment, sweet emotion that comes with the financial, physical and emotional strain plus the rest of the 'baggage', I wouldn't trade for anything.
This is not something someone looking in from the outside can understand. You cannot explain it but only be experienced. I literally stare at my children every day and know I would choose to be a mother over and over again.
I am willing to stay in this 'prison' and bear all the implications that come with the title (mother) for the rest of my life if I can have this feeling forever.

But that's me. Women out there who are genuinely happy without this bliss should not be given the side eye. They should be left to enjoy the other things that fulfill them and bring them happiness with no guilt. There are as many good reasons not to have children as there are those to have them.

Feel free to share your honest opinion. I'll go back to breastfeeding now. Till next time, cheers.

LT